This is (not) the actual transcript of the phone conversation between John Calipari and Chane Behanan.
Scene: Chane Behanan, the number 29 recruit in the class of 2011, is packing up for his official visit to the University of Louisville.
Chane's phone rings.
CB: Hello?
JC: Hey Chane! This is coach John Calipari calling from the University of Kentucky. What are you up to?
CB: Hey coach! I'm just packing my bags and getting ready for my official trip to "Loserville". (Both parties give a chuckle)
JC: How about I save you a trip. How about you come and play basketball for me and be a Wildcat.
CB: I thought you would never ask! Thanks coach! I really didn't want to visit there anyway. Rick Pitino gives me the creeps if you catch my drift. He was going to take me to a restaurant with a bunch of guys in their late 50's. That sounds really awkward to me.
JC: That guy is a weirdo. Besides, wouldn't it be just plain awful to get beat by Kentucky and everybody in the Big East year in and year out?
CB: You bet coach! I also am looking forward to playing with top notch recruits such as Anthony Davis, Mike Gilchrist and Marques Teague!
JC: You better believe it buddy!
CB: Now my mom won't be sore at me for visiting someone that she says is an immoral degenerate. Plus I don't think I would look good with a line beard and a body full of tattoo's.
JC: Have you seen that tattoo Mike Marra has?
CB: Yeah! That clown in a straight jacket. What the hell is that supposed to mean, anyway?
JC: I think his uncle is a member of the Insane Clown Posse or something.
CB: Well, thanks coach for making me a a part of the #1 class in 2011!
JC: You betcha buddy!
Rick Pitino: You got Teague-Bagged by Coach Cal. Again.
What?
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